When it starts to end

And again the same sinking feeling. Killing me every moment. And this relationship will also end eventually. Never thought I'll google something like 'mild heart pain when hurt emotionally'. Ever heard of broken heart syndrome? Yes it exists.
Broken heart syndrome is commonly described as a physical pain in the heart or chest area, which is due to the emotional stress caused by a traumatic breakup or the death of a loved one.
Almost a week now experiencing such a pain. This will fade away and will take with it all the leftover charm I had like all previous relations did but this time something really precious. My feelings. What will be left behind will be a breathing machine with a pulsating heavy stone in her chest. That is what I deserve. This will take away my will power, my dreams. With every dying relation i have emerged stronger than before. Every time I had managed to put together all the broken pieces of my heart and start afresh. But after this, my heart will be crushed to dust, I will never be able to love anyone again. This will never happen to me again because I'll never believe in it anymore. 

After all this is what I deserve. This is what all the hearts deserve who have loved someone so serenely. Someone has rightly said ' People are stupid '.